


A Different Island

by zelda_zee



Category: Lost
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-04
Updated: 2014-08-04
Packaged: 2018-02-11 18:52:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,784
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2079276
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zelda_zee/pseuds/zelda_zee
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Richard and Jin meet in no-man's-land and form their own version of a truce.</p><p>Originally posted for the Lost Luau on 7/31/10.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Different Island

The first time, Jin had almost gotten himself killed.

He was alone, on patrol. It was pitch black, the foliage overhead too dense to allow the passage of light, even though the moon was full. Normally Jin would have been partnered with someone, but half the compound was down with the flu, and the security detail was stretched thin, so he was on his own which was fine by him.

He’d reached the far end of the Dharma property, traversed a narrow valley that opened up at the end to a view of the ocean far below. Most places this far in you couldn’t see the water. It was a drawback of living at the barracks – Jin missed the ocean.

Technically, the valley was a sort of no-man’s-land, and the standard practice while on patrol was to steer clear of it. The Others considered it theirs and commonly used it to cut across the uplands, but on the Dharma maps it was clearly marked as within the DI boundary. Nonetheless, they avoided it. No point in looking for trouble, if trouble wasn't looking for you.

Jin moved silently, following the path of a stream that spilled out from the ledge that marked the end of the valley, falling a hundred feet to a rocky pool below. There was a plateau of flat stone there studded with a few huge boulders, and that’s where the view was best, where you could look out over the tops of the trees and see the moonlight sparkling on the sea.

He was standing there, rifle leaned against a nearby boulder, when he heard a distinctive _click_ and felt the cool press of metal at the back of his neck.

“Slowly, now,” said a quiet, calm voice. “Turn around.”

Jin did, hands held away from his sides. He glanced at his rifle, but it was out of reach, a careless mistake that Jim would be very angry about if he’d known.

Jin knew the man holding the gun on him. Richard Alpert, the one who spoke for the Others; the one rumored to be ageless. Jin had heard people say that he had been on the island since the beginning of time, but he didn’t put much credence in crazy stories like that.

“Well, my friend,” Richard said. “You seem to have wandered beyond the perimeter.”

“No,” Jin protested. “Dharma land.”

“I think not.” Richard was still pointing his revolver at Jin’s face. “This has always been our land and is still our land, and Goodspeed and the rest of your people know it. You just keep trying to push us off of it and it’s not going to work.”

Jin swallowed his response, thinking maybe silence was better than his broken English. He could understand – had been able to for a long time now, since before they’d ended up here in the past – but he still wasn’t able to express himself well even at the best of times, and having a gun pointed at his face certainly didn’t help his fluency.

“What are you doing here?” Richard’s eyes were trained on him with a degree of intensity that was arresting, even given the situation.

What answer could Jin give? He had no justification for his presence in the disputed territory. There was only the truth, which seemed just as likely to get him shot as not.

“Ocean,” Jin said, gesturing toward the view. “We no see ocean from the bar – bar-racks.”

“Ocean.” Richard frowned at him.

“Yes.” Jin chanced a quick peek over his shoulder. The ocean still sparkled far below them, beyond the tops of the waving trees. “I come, see ocean.”

Richard’s eyes widened and his expression changed. Still wary, still suspicious, but not as grim. “Ah. You like the ocean?”

“Yes.” Jin had to think hard to try to string the uncooperative words together. If he could get Richard to see that he was only here for the view, perhaps the man would let him go. “I fish, long time past. In ocean. My father, boat. We catch many fish, sell at market. I like ocean.”

"You're Kwon, aren't you?" Richard asked. "You arrived with LaFleur?"

Jin nodded. He had no idea how Richard knew who he was, or what he knew about Jim. There were probably spies, he realized.

Richard tilted his head, watching Jin steadily. Finally, he lowered his gun.

He re-set the safety, stuffed the gun back into its holster and Jin breathed a sigh of relief. “As it happens,” Richard said, “I am fond of the view from this spot too.” He turned to gaze out over the expanse of island and sea and starry, moonlit sky. Jin watched him carefully, not trusting him the slightest bit, even with his gun holstered. “Sometimes I don’t see the water for a long time. I have duties, you know. They take up a surprising amount of time.” He turned to look at Jin, his face bathed in the strange, silvered light, bright as day but devoid of color. “How much of what I say do you understand?”

“I understand, I no speak.”

Richard nodded as if this confirmed what he'd thought.

“All right. I’ll make a deal with you. You can come here to look at the view – just you, nobody else – and I’ll leave you alone. But you have to do the same for me.”

“I will,” Jin agreed. “But the rest – I no say for them.”

“Neither of us can speak for our people about this. But if you want to come here to look at the ocean, I won’t try to stop you, understand?”

“Yes. Good.” Jin was not about to argue. After all, Richard was still the one with the gun. But, ultimately, Jin didn’t much care about territorial battles between the Dharma Initiative and the Others. He wanted to be safe, to keep the people he knew and cared about safe, but that was it. Whether this little patch of land with the lovely view belonged to the Others or not wasn’t his problem. Let Horace and his coterie of Dharma insiders figure that one out.

Jin thought Richard would go then, but instead he said, “I’m just going to take my gun and put it next to yours.” He slowly drew the gun and put it on the ground beside Jin’s, then removed his pack and sat on the ground, facing out toward the ocean. He looked up at Jin, lip quirking in a smile. “Sit. We’re both here for the view, so we might as well enjoy it.”

Jin approached cautiously and sat, not too close, watching Richard out of the corner of his eye. Richard rummaged around in his bag, pulled out a canteen and a banana. Apparently, he was settling in for a snack.

They sat quietly for a short spell. Richard peeled his banana, broke it in two and handed half to Jin. It seemed too intimate a gesture, but as his eyes flicked to Richard’s Jin could see something there – a question, a test. So he took the banana half with a murmured _thank you_.

It should make Jin uneasy, sitting there beside Richard – an Other and possibly an immortal and who knew what else? He was hyper-aware of Richard’s presence, of his every movement, the cadence of his breath, the sound of him swallowing as he ate. But as the moments went by, Jin relaxed fractionally, until his attention was drawn by the beauty spread out before them as if it had been painted on some magical, living canvas. Jin often felt that he hated the island more than anything he had ever known, but he could not deny that it was the most beautiful place he had seen.

“It’s really something, isn’t it?” Richard said. “I’ve lived here for a very long time, and yet I never tire of it.”

Jin snorted.

“You don’t like it?” Richard asked.

“No,” Jin said. “Not like it here.”

“Then why did you come?”

“I –” Jin shook his head. “I not –” He hesitated. Richard didn’t know about them and Jin wasn’t sure what he’d do if he found out that there were people on the island who’d traveled back in time from 30 years in the future. “I not like it,” he said.

“Well, I guess that’s what you get, signing on for some experimental society when you don’t really know what you're getting into.”

Jin pressed his lips together but remained silent.

“I often wonder what motivates you people to come here. The Dharma Initiative – I know what they’re after. But people like you, ordinary people who leave everything behind to join a – well, to speak plainly, to join a cult where they’ll just be taken advantage of you – that I don’t understand.”

“I not join,” Jin said. He shouldn’t, but he hated being lumped together with people like Phil and Radzinsky.

Richard’s eyebrows shot up. “You didn’t?”

“I have to. To survive. Only way.” Richard frowned, watching him intently, his eyes full of questions. “No more,” Jin said, and turned his attention back to the view, debating whether he had already said too much.

“I came here against my will,” Richard said. Jin knew he had not succeeded in keeping the surprise from showing on his face. He’d thought Richard had been born here. Everyone did. “I came here in chains, as a matter of fact.” A corner of his lip quirked in a humorless smile. “For years I thought I didn’t belong here, that I’d thrown my life away. But, in time, the island became my home and I grew to understand that this is where I belong. There’s no place else in the world for me.” He smiled gently at Jin. “Maybe someday you’ll feel that way too.”

“Not the same,” Jin said, turning back to the view. He turned over what Richard had said in his mind. _In chains_. Jin could not imagine what he meant by that.

He started when Richard stood, so distracted had he been by his thoughts.

“I must go,” Richard said. “But perhaps I will see you here again sometime, Jin. I often visit this spot when the moon is full.”

Jin looked up at him, surprised that Richard would give so much away. It was foolhardy for him to let his movements be known by a member of the DI. Or it could be a trap, meant to lure them out into this area in pursuit of Richard so that the Others could ambush them.

“Perhaps,” he said noncommittally.

Richard picked up his gun and slid it into the holster. He smiled. “Until next time, then,” and he was gone, faded noiselessly into the shadow of the trees between one blink and the next.

 

 

The next time, Jin went not knowing what to expect.

The flu epidemic had passed, but Jin was on his own again anyway. Jim would blow a gasket if he knew, but the thing about the Dharma Initiative was that there was a lot that went on that the men in charge (because they were all men who were in charge) knew nothing about. They liked to think they had the drop on everyone, but Jin had learned early on that the public face of harmonious and enthusiastic adherence to Dharma policies went only skin deep.

At any rate, Phil had a date – or whatever passed for a date in Dharmaville - and he was the one who was supposed to be Jin’s patrol partner for the night. Of course, according to the rules a date was no excuse for skipping work, but that’s where the disconnect between the ideal of the steadfast and devoted Dharma worker and reality set in.

Jin caught glimpses of the full moon as he made his way down the valley, slivers of brightness between the overhanging branches. He wondered whether Richard would be there – and whether he would prefer him to be or not. He wondered about the risk he was running – the possibility of trap or ambush was very real, even if, when he remembered the way Richard had acted last time, it seemed unlikely. He wondered why he was going there at all – he could tell himself it was for the view, but the truth was a bit more complicated.

The truth lay in the way each day folded into the next like a slow-motion cascade of dominoes, the one before falling into the one after in endless, unalterable succession. He could not think about it – the passage of time, the shape of his future – without a feeling like a fist squeezing his lungs taking hold in his chest, forcing all the air out of him.

So he forged ahead, embracing the risk, relishing the unaccustomed feeling of not knowing what would happen. Either he would have a few moments alone to enjoy the view, or Richard would be there, in which case it was anyone’s guess what would come next.

He moved more stealthily as he approached the place where the trees opened out around that rocky ledge, taking care to make no noise. He paused when he reached the clearing and there, seated with his back to Jin, looking out over the view of the island and the sea, was Richard.

“I could hear you coming for the past three minutes,” Richard said, not raising his voice, but the sound carrying clearly right down to the wry humor laced through his tone. “You people will never be able to take over this island if you can’t move through it more quietly than that.”

Jin grimaced, for he had put extra effort into moving silently. “I not want frighten you,” he said, moving across the ledge toward Richard.

Richard turned to look at him. “Oh, is that it?”

“Yes,” Jin said blandly. “They say Others frighten easy. You might fall.” He gestured toward the cliff edge.

Richard smiled. “You thought I might panic and tumble to my death?” Jin nodded, trying to keep a straight face at the idea of Richard panicking. “Well then, I thank you. Never let it be said that the Dharma Initiative does not look after _all_ the inhabitants of this island.”

Jin settled down beside Richard and for a moment neither of them spoke. The view was as lovely as it always was from this spot, high and wide, like they were seated at the top of the world.

“I didn’t think you’d come,” Richard said.

“I –” Jin hesitated. He wasn’t even sure what he wanted to say. “I do not know why.”

“You don’t know why you came?” Jin nodded. “Hmm.” Richard turned to gaze out toward the sea. “Well,” he murmured, “you can always tell yourself that you came for the view, right?”

After a while, Jin opened his pack. He’d been saving up for this, secreting away bits of his rations – an apple, a couple of cookies, a few squares of a chocolate bar. It wasn’t much, but he was willing to bet it was all food that Richard didn’t have easy access to, and indeed, from the way he was staring at the meager spread as if it was a sumptuous feast and he a starving man, Jin must have guessed right.

He split a cookie in two just as Richard had split his banana last time, and handed Richard half.

“Thank you,” Richard said. He took a bite and closed his eyes as he chewed. “Wow.” He smiled as he swallowed the last bite. “That was good.”

Jin felt inordinately pleased. He had to admit that his sole purpose in packing the food tonight had been to please Richard and he could not help but feel gratified that he had succeeded. As to why he had wished to please Richard in the first place, of that he was less sure. Richard was the enemy and Jin supposed that if he considered himself a member of the Dharma Initiative in any real way, that’s how he’d think of him. And maybe the Others _were_ enemies. Certainly, Jin couldn’t imagine himself sitting quietly and admiring a view with any of the people who’d terrorized them during their first months on the island. But Richard didn’t seem to fit with those people. He didn’t seem to fit anywhere.

“I was a farmer,” Richard said out of the blue. “Once, a long, long time ago.”

Jin looked at him curiously, wondering what prompted that statement.

Richard shrugged. “You told me you were a fisherman. I thought it’d be fair if you knew my background as well. I wasn’t always here on the island, doing what I do now. I had a life before, short though it was. Sometimes it feels like that was the only part of my life that was real." He fell silent for a long moment. "I had a wife. But I lost her.”

"I have a wife," Jin said. "I lost her too. But someday... someday I find her."

“Yes, of course you will,” Richard murmured.

“Your wife,” Jin ventured. “She is..?”

“She died. She was ill and I could not save her. There was a doctor who wouldn’t treat her and –” Richard sighed, hand shading his eyes. “It was all so long ago. She died alone, without me. I think if I could change anything about my life that is the one thing. I’d have been by her side when she died. I’d have held her hand in mine as she drew her last breath.” He looked at Jin and his eyes were shining. “Maybe if I’d done that, I’d be able to live with the rest of it.”

“I’m sorry,” Jin said. What else was there to say? There was so much regret in Richard’s voice and sadness in his face, that any words of comfort Jin could offer would seem trite. He put his hand on Richard’s arm instead, a simple gesture that felt monumental. Richard looked down, staring until Jin removed it. Richard met his eyes then, and there was something new there.

“You’re not one of them,” he said softly. “Not really.”

“No,” Jin said, just as softly, but quite definitively. “I am not.”

Richard nodded once, looked back out toward the ocean.

“There’s something…” He stopped, took a breath and turned back to Jin. “There’s something I want to try – if you let me.” He shifted closer and before Jin could react, Richard was reaching out, his fingers grazing Jin’s cheek. “Just…” he murmured, very close and it was with a start that Jin realized where this was going. “I want…”

Richard’s lips were on his, a light, dry kiss that shocked Jin into stillness. He stared at Richard as he drew back, too stunned to be able to decide what to do.

Richard laughed awkwardly. “Oh. So… I probably shouldn’t have done that.”

Jin licked his lips, not realizing what he did until Richard’s eyes dropped to his mouth. He felt his skin heat and he wasn’t sure if it was embarrassment or something more. Richard wanted to kiss him again. Jin could read it in his face and, to his surprise, Jin thought he maybe wanted him to.

It wasn’t the right thing to want. Somewhere out there, Jin had to believe that Sun yet lived and as long as she lived, he was hers, heart and soul. He shouldn’t want to kiss this strange man who he barely knew – who anyone else would deem an enemy. Sun would not understand. He tried to imagine confessing it to her and could not.

But he had nothing here, nothing but a narrow bed in a quiet room, days filled with routine and spent with people he’d just as soon never have met. This situation was something so far out of Jin’s experience that he could almost convince himself that Richard had no relation to the rest of his life. Not to the day to day grind of life in Dharmaville; not to his marriage and the life he led before he ended up on the island. It was as if this meeting place of theirs existed in an alternate reality in a parallel world on a different island.

Jin was moving forward before he’d consciously decided to, reaching for Richard and pulling him closer. Richard’s breath hitched, his eyes widened in evident surprise in the instant before Jin kissed him. After the briefest hesitation, Richard kissed him back, slowly and carefully, one hand at the side of Jin’s face, fingers stroking just behind his ear. It was Jin who deepened the kiss, Jin who coaxed Richard’s mouth open and slipped his tongue inside. Richard was all heat and hardness, eager mouth and grasping hands, sharp angles and muscled limbs -- nothing like what Jin was used to, nothing like what he'd thought he liked.

But he liked this, there was no denying it. His heart was beating fast, his breath coming quick, and he could feel the desire for more banked low in his body, a heavy, warm ache in his cock that made him want to grind against Richard and take anything the man would let him have.

Richard moaned when Jin’s tongue rubbed against his and it made a wave of heat wash over Jin. He surged against Richard, bore him back and down to the ground, mouths open against each other, kisses gone wet and sloppy, tongues probing deeply then twining and flirting. Richard’s hands were in Jin’s hair, holding on. Jin ran a hand down Richard’s side, grabbed his hip and rocked down. It was pure instinct, an action devoid of thought, and it sent a spike of lust through Jin, made him draw back with a gasp and stare down at Richard.

Richard stared back, dark eyes almost black. “Don’t stop,” he whispered. “Please, don’t –” He groaned as Jin ground against him and thrust up to meet him. Jin could feel Richard’s erection through the layers of their clothing. It was unfamiliar, but not strange enough to make him pause. Quite the opposite in fact, as they moved together, building a rhythm punctuated by the sound of quiet gasps and moans.

Richard tugged at the zipper of Jin’s jumpsuit, his hands sliding inside as the fabric parted. Jin faltered as Richard’s hands slid up his sides, over his chest, his touch sure, the roughness of his hands, the catch of calluses against his skin making him shiver.

Richard yanked at the jumpsuit, pulling it down over Jin’s shoulder. “I’ve always hated these stupid things,” he said breathlessly, smiling up at Jin. Jin sat back on his heels and shrugged out of it. He was naked under the jumpsuit but for his briefs, and when Richard saw that his smile widened. “But I suppose they have their good points.” His fingers flirted along the waistband of Jin’s underwear, then moved downward over the cotton to trace lightly over his cock.

Jin swallowed, closing his eyes as a shudder hit him. He opened them again and watched Richard’s hand move over his cloth-encased erection. Richard hooked his fingers into the waistband and pulled it down, exposing him and Jin closed his eyes again, not quite able to bear the sight of Richard seeing his nakedness.

“Take this off,” Richard said hoarsely.

Jin pushed it down, though ‘off’ would involve removing his boots and he wasn’t inclined to take the time. Richard stripped off his shirt, unbuttoned his khakis and shoved them down around his thighs then yanked Jin back down on top of him. It was a shock, all that skin, the electrical burst of pleasure when their cocks collided, the needy burr of friction when he rocked his hips, slow and hard, into Richard’s.

Richard’s hands slid down Jin’s back, gripped his ass, fingers digging in painfully and it made Jin’s muscles tense, made him inhale sharply. There was a sudden moment of clarity – awareness of Richard lying beneath him panting and thrusting, eyes shadowed, moonlight glinting on the whiteness of teeth glimpsed between parted lips, the slide of skin against skin, the hair on Richard’s torso a completely novel sensation when it rubbed against Jin. There was the realization of what he was doing - _having sex with a man_ \- a frisson of disbelief at his actions that lasted for barely the space of a breath, until Richard’s mouth was on his neck, open and wet and sucking up a mouthful of skin in such a way as to cause Jin to groan and buck and lose himself again in motion and heat and lust.

Richard was muttering something in another language, no doubt his native language whatever that was. Jin thought that if he tried to form words they’d be in Korean, but the noises he was making weren’t anything close to actual language, nothing anyone would need to translate.

Jin felt Richard’s hand snake between their bodies and a second later he moaned as it wrapped around him. It didn’t take long then, with Richard’s hand holding their cocks tightly together, jerking them so roughly that it would have hurt if not for the slickness of their precome easing the way. Richard went over first, with a long, agonized groan, his head falling back; Jin followed when he felt Richard’s semen splash warm against his belly and groin, thrusting mindlessly as the white-hot pleasure overwhelmed him, his face buried against Richard’s shoulder. He gasped his way through his orgasm, tried to hold himself up off of Richard as it ebbed and every fiber of his body wanted to go limp on top of him, regardless of the mess painted over their stomachs.

Richard laughed weakly as Jin rolled off to the side to lie beside him staring up at the sky.

“It pleases me to discover that life can still surprise me,” he said. He turned to look at Jin, the moonlight making the sheen of sweat on his face shine. “You might be surprised how seldom that happens.”

“I surprise you?”

“Oh yes.” Richard reached over, fingertips tracing lazy paths over Jin’s face. “You surprise me, Jin. In many ways.”

 

 

The next time, Jin went knowing full well what to expect.

Even so, Richard managed to sneak up on him, approaching noiselessly so that Jin wasn’t aware of his presence until he felt Richard’s breath warm at the back of his neck. He started, but Richard whispered, “It’s all right, it’s just me,” into Jin’s ear and he stilled, though he didn’t entirely relax, especially when he felt Richard’s hand at his hip, his grip firm, holding Jin in place as Richard pressed up against him from behind.

Jin had been on edge for days, more and more keyed up as the full moon approached, and now he felt as if his body was fully primed, ready to go off at the first touch. He stifled the groan that wanted to escape as Richard drew him back against his body, kissed his neck, licked a path up behind his ear.

“I’ve thought about this,” Richard said, voice low. “Every day for the past month, I’ve thought about this.”

Jin didn’t reply, but his breath came faster. He closed his eyes, swallowed hard, tried to decide whether he should try to hold on or just give in.

“You’d better tell me now if you’ve changed your mind,” Richard said. “because there's so much I want to do - if you don't want it I need to know now.” Richard bit, a sharp pain followed by heat, and another and another, down Jin's neck to his shoulder where he fit his mouth over the muscle there and sucked. Jin gasped, shuddered, tilted his head to bare his neck for Richard, figured that was answer enough. He couldn’t think clearly enough to string the words together in English, not with Richard’s teeth and tongue doing things to him that made his knees weak.

He reached back, grasped Richard by the neck, slid his fingers into his short hair and gave in, unzipping his jumpsuit himself, taking Richard’s hand in his and showing him where he wanted it. Richard groaned when he discovered himself unimpeded by undergarments, encountering only naked skin beneath the jumpsuit. Jin flushed hot, feeling slutty and embarrassed and aroused, his dick hardening quickly in Richard’s hand.

“There you go surprising me again,” Richard said, giving him a squeeze and a twist that made Jin’s eyes roll back in his head. “Let’s see if I can’t return the favor.”

Jin found himself spun around and backed up against a boulder and before he had reoriented himself Richard’s mouth crushed his in a deep, lewd kiss, then he abruptly dropped to his knees and engulfed Jin’s cock in the shocking heat and wetness of his mouth. It was a beautiful sensation and a beautiful sight, Richard, on his knees, those strange, dark eyes gazing up at him. Jin was indeed surprised, but he could not focus on that, not with Richard working him so cleverly, sweet suction, soft pressure, the flick of tongue and the teasing scrape of teeth all driving him quickly to a place where he teetered blindly on the edge, panting and gasping, his fingers scrabbling against the rock behind him.

Richard held him there for endless, agonizing moments, his hands strong on Jin’s hips, his mouth slowed to long, lazy pulls and slow, tight descents that had Jin writhing against his grip and begging with every cell of his body for the nudge that would plunge him into the freefall of orgasm.

He got it when Richard’s hands released his hips, moved down over the muscles of his thighs, then up over his ass, stroking and kneading as Jin’s hips slammed forward, wild and unrestrained, and Richard took it like like it was no effort at all, took everything Jin gave him, drank him down greedily when he came with a yell that echoed off the rocks around them.

Jin slid down the boulder to sprawl on the ground, his body still shaking with pleasurable aftershocks, his mind swept clear by the whirlwind of animal sensation. It was with great effort that he opened his eyes, focused them on Richard kneeling between his legs. Even in the dark he looked debauched, his hair mussed, his lips swollen. Jin thought about doing to Richard what Richard had done to him, wondered if he would like it, if he would be able to figure out what to do. He wondered what else Richard would want. He was pretty sure Richard would want it all, if Jin were willing. He wasn’t sure that he was, but then, thus far Richard had proved to be very persuasive.

“Come here,” Jin said, his voice scratching in his throat. “I will…” He gestured toward the visible bulge at Richard’s crotch. He wasn’t sure what he intended to do, figured he would just see how it went, but Richard shook his head, smiling.

“I can wait,” he said, his smile widening at Jin’s raised eyebrows. “I have learned to appreciate the rewards of patience. It took me a lifetime to learn that.” He chuckled. “It’s not that late. We have the whole night ahead of us.”

Richard sat at his side, leaning back against the boulder. They talked desultorily – about the island, about their pasts, never about anything having to do with the rancorous feud between the Dharma Initiative and the Others. That topic was off-limits, it went without saying. They shared the food they had brought, split the bottle of Dharma wine Jin had stolen from the storeroom, passing it back and forth between them.

Jin was feeling pleasantly relaxed and more contented than he had in a long time, when Richard turned to him with a dark, hungry look in his eyes, pushed him gently down onto the ground and proceeded to demonstrate to Jin just how very persuasive he could be.

 

 

The last time, Jin went not knowing it would be the last time.

They had done what they always did, what they had been doing for a couple of years now, no inkling that there was anything different about this time. Jin didn’t know what to call what they did. Fucking. Making love. Those were the only words he knew that referred to whatever it was that he and Richard did, and neither of them seemed quite right. He thought maybe there wasn’t a word for it; that maybe like everything else he and Richard were to each other, it existed in a different place, someplace that belonged only to the two of them, where the usual names and labels and rules didn’t apply.

So they did what they always did, and they ate and drank and talked and then they did it again. They joked and laughed as they dressed, smoothed each other’s hair, ma king sure the other was presentable enough not to arouse suspicion when they returned to their separate worlds. And then Richard kissed him and told him to be careful and not to do anything stupid until he saw him again and Jin said he was always careful not to do anything stupid and Richard said _except this_ and Jin agreed, _yes, except this_ and Richard smiled and walked off into the darkness.

There was nothing different about that time, nothing to indicate it was the last time that he and Richard would be together in their secret place, or that Jin would never again see the clearing that opened out to the wide view of the sea or the full moon shining bright in the sky. His thoughts, as he made his way back to the barracks, were uncomplicated and peaceful – reminiscences of the things that he and Richard had done that evening, appreciation of the satisfying aches in his body from their recent exertions, anticipation of the comfort of his bed. That was why he needed Richard, because being with him was like a strong wind that cleared away the clutter and debris of his life and made it all simple again.

Jin crept silently between the quiet houses, moving like a shadow through the dead zones between the surveillance cameras. He paused at his doorstep to look up at the moon, wondering if Richard could see it from where he was now or if he was deep in the jungle, with only darkness around him.

Another endless month to be lived through, he thought, another progression of identical days so dull that he would wonder if he’d actually make it until the next full moon.

With one last backward glance at the sky, he went inside, closing the door softly behind him.


End file.
